[Report This]Date: 14 Oct 2011 8:38 PM Title: Chapter 14
hmmm guess they shouldnt piss off charlie
Date: 14 Oct 2011 3:56 PM Title: Chapter 15
I am glad you finished this. Even if it was short it covered the story. Thank you
Author's Response:
thank u and ur welcome, check out my other stories too
Date: 14 Oct 2011 4:48 AM Title: Chapter 15
I'm so glad you decided to go ahead and finish the story. I really loved it. :-)
Author's Response:
thanks
Date: 23 Aug 2011 3:12 AM Title: Chapter 13
That's too bad this story isn't going to be finished. Won't you reconsider?
Date: 14 Jul 2011 5:35 PM Title: Chapter 1
:)
Author's Response:
this story wont be finished u want it?
Date: 14 Jul 2011 2:07 AM Title: Chapter 12
Honey you have to quit repeating it all. Now we have to move on.
1. will Bella forgive them?
2. will Bella stay in Volterra?
3. Will Caius allow her to leave if she wants to?
4. What punishment will Edward and the Cullens receive for leaving her ALIVE and not changed?
5. Bella has to sit down and go through all this with her children. Then need to love their family. It is not good to grow up with hate in your heart, vampire or not.
I hope that gets you going.
Author's Response:
i wont be finishing this story sry
Date: 14 Jul 2011 2:04 AM Title: Chapter 13
hmmm wonder how long the wonder twin ban will last though?
Date: 14 Jul 2011 1:59 AM Title: Chapter 11
Interesting you are writing on the fly. If you want this to flow then make an out line and build within it.
You need to make sure when you are saying "him" we know who "HIM" is.
What we have so far is Edward left Bella told her the regular stuff, I don't love you or want you and neither does my family. Then she is pregnant Aro finds this out when he goes to visit Carlisle and follows the sent of Edward and the human. Next we have the babies born in Volterra and the Cullens came to see what has happened to Bella. Caius has adopted Bella "mentally" he is not allowing anyone to hurt her or the babies. Seems Aro is now being protective as well. Babies are very smart and mature. Of course vamp/human babies.
Edward now wants to win her back. And his children are mad at him.
Date: 14 Jul 2011 1:34 AM Title: Chapter 10
Okay well, I am gonna just jump in and say. The things Edward said to "Bella" were MEAN especially like she said the day after having their first and only sexual encounter. So no. Forgive him, no. If the children want to see their father then I would allow that. For myself, I would say never again buster!
Date: 14 Jul 2011 1:16 AM Title: Chapter 8
That imprinting on babies, is WRONG.
Author's Response:
their not going have a realtion until thei 18 atleast
Date: 14 Jul 2011 1:08 AM Title: Chapter 7
Yes I like it. You must be foreign, I think you need a beta. Other wise your story is coming along. I only thought it odd that in a foreign country Jacob could find Bella without a phone or address.
Author's Response:
no i not foreign.... i wont be finishing this story, im actually trying to find someone to take over the story
Date: 14 Jul 2011 1:01 AM Title: Chapter 6
Demitri and Caius are connected to Bella in some way. Good she has allies now that will love her since Edward does not.
Date: 14 Jul 2011 12:52 AM Title: Chapter 4
IT is tollerate not toilette. FYI..
Well she needs potty, food and bed. New clothes as she expands and DOCTORS there all the time.
Date: 14 Jul 2011 12:46 AM Title: Chapter 3
Aro, old unhappy mean Aro will help her. That is a switch.
Author's Response:
oh shit i just noticed i reponded to the wrong story lol sorry thanks for the review
Date: 14 Jul 2011 12:43 AM Title: Chapter 1
Ha ha! TWINS..
Author's Response:
sneak peek
" what do you mean your moving out?!" Edward yelled at me.
" She means what she just said, she's bored and lonely and wants to move out, her contract clearly saying she can leave if she wants to.
" Emmett do something! she can't leave! she's caring my baby! she can't leave me!" Edward order to my surprise, but i kept a poker face like Rosalie said.
" I can't Edward, you must've really ** her off." Emmett said.
" Why would you leave Bella? i gave you everything i thought i could i'll change please, i'll go home every night, but don't leave." Edward begged
i looked over at Rosalie saw her glared i can't let him win to easily.
" i'm sorry Edward, but did you really think i would be ok staying in that house all by myself with no one to talk to at all?" i said softly"
"Bella babe there you are! come on let get this show on the road" i turn to see my best friend Jacob Black
Date: 06 Aug 2010 6:18 AM Title: Chapter 12
AWESOME thats all I can say.
Date: 12 Jul 2010 1:12 AM Title: Chapter 11
I love this chapter.... please update soon... I hope that Edward and Bella can make it work out...
Author's Response:
i have no idea how the start the next chapter so it will take away. have any ideas?
[Report This]Date: 07 Jul 2010 6:03 PM Title: Chapter 11
this is a really good story so far. i cant wait to read more. and ihope that edward has to beg for forgiveness for a really long time
Author's Response:
trust me he will. i always hated how Bella forgave him so easly. read my other story too!- mili
Date: 06 Jul 2010 4:29 AM Title: Chapter 11
not that he didnt deserve it but wow
Author's Response:
He needs a good asskicking. In this story Bella won't forgive him easliy. i hope you keep reading. read my other story too it's good i think lol - mili
[Report This]Date: 06 Jul 2010 3:41 AM Title: Chapter 11
Bella's son is a tough little one! I like him a lot. Update soon. :)
Author's Response:
Thanks so much for the review i hope you keep reading and reviewing. read my other story too! - mili
Date: 27 Jun 2010 4:57 AM Title: Chapter 10
i liked it
Author's Response:
thanxs -mili
Date: 27 Jun 2010 2:15 AM Title: Chapter 10
lizzie is cool
Author's Response:
yup
Date: 26 Jun 2010 1:35 PM Title: Chapter 10
What a great chapter... update soon...
Date: 26 Jun 2010 4:26 AM Title: Chapter 10
well i would have done a lot more to edward ! cant wait till the next chapter
Author's Response:
the story isn't over yet. Edward will get a good beatdown. -mili
Date: 17 Jun 2010 9:01 PM Title: Chapter 9
Wow, you have grown quickly as a writer...love the foreshadowing w/ Caius and can't wait to follow more.
Cyndi
Author's Response:
thanxs for much for the review
Date: 17 Jun 2010 5:17 AM Title: Chapter 9
well basically you could have said this
-edward goes to bella's house
-edwards finds bellas been gone for 5 months
-cullens travel to see the volterra to get bella
-cullens arrive with unease
-bella makes appearance and someone yells "daddy"
and there you have your chapter,
i feel there could have had more depth to edwards pov, including more of deep thoughts and feelings. i feel that there could be more angst in your story to give it some edge.. and not every problem you present in the story needs a cookie cutter solution.
Author's Response:
whats a cookie cutter solution?
Date: 16 Jun 2010 7:38 PM Title: Chapter 9
this is a very good story please update soon
[Report This]Date: 16 Jun 2010 2:34 PM Title: Chapter 9
Evil cliffy! Darn you. hehehe Update soon. :)
Author's Response:
lol im happy u like it
Date: 16 Jun 2010 2:31 PM Title: Chapter 9
I have really enjoyed reading your story... update soon please.. I am looking forward to see where this goes... I want Edward and Bella to be happy.. and with their child... is it a boy or girl??
Author's Response:
they will have their happy ending, but this Edward has to know that it won't be easy as pie to get Bella and his children back. i always thought bella took edwards back to easly in the real story. he could've at least fought for her right'? beg or something. its a girl and a boy. in ch. 8 in the end in bella's pov it has it. hope you keep reading.
Date: 16 Jun 2010 2:29 PM Title: Chapter 9
great chapter! cant wait till the next one!
Date: 11 Jun 2010 12:43 AM Title: Chapter 8
Great imagination...I usually get irritated w/ grammer/spelling errors and quit a story but yours is so compelling that I'm hooked!
Keep it coming!
Author's Response:
um... thanks lol i am trying here! lol
Date: 09 Jun 2010 2:28 PM Title: Chapter 8
this is a really great story it is really different from all the other storys i have read but in a really good way i hope you post another chapter soon.
Author's Response:
thank you
Date: 09 Jun 2010 1:53 PM Title: Chapter 8
Let her go all bareseck on their asses for a bit!! It will be sooo much fun!!
xoxo
MArianne
Author's Response:
will do! ;)
Date: 09 Jun 2010 3:37 AM Title: Chapter 8
whats with the z88???? its extremely annoying i hope that wasnt done on purpose because if so its very unnecessary
Author's Response:
sorry, but i did say i didn't know how to take it off. it pissed the living hell out of me. everytime i went back to fix it, it all went down hill sorry. i have no idea how to take it down. - mili
Date: 09 Jun 2010 3:02 AM Title: Chapter 8
I hope next chapter is up soon. I can't wait.
Author's Response:
it will be. it might be shorter, but it will be Bella pov. then in comes Edward pov. i hope you keep reading.
Date: 09 Jun 2010 1:24 AM Title: Chapter 8
aww leah imprinted too.
Author's Response:
yup, but it won't be easy for either Jacob or Leah as soon as the Cullens come into view- i hope you keep reading and reviewingmili :)
[Report This]Date: 08 Jun 2010 6:17 PM Title: Chapter 8
I just want to be a fly on the wall when edward learns she was pregnant with his kids and his reaction to what happend after he left. Keep up the great work.. Poor bella both kids imprinted/mated..... hmm interesting thought ...
Author's Response:
thanks - mili
Date: 08 Jun 2010 5:33 PM Title: Chapter 8
I cant wait for he next chapter
Author's Response:
great! thanxs for reading - mili
Date: 08 Jun 2010 4:35 PM Title: Chapter 8
oew i kinda hopes she kicks their asses like in the book..that was so much fun to read about
Author's Response:
well the story isn't over yet. Emmet will be doing the ass kicking to Jacob and Rose to Leah lol
Author's Response:
well the story isn't over yet. Emmet will be doing the ass kicking to Jacob and Rose to Leah lol
Date: 27 May 2010 6:54 PM Title: Chapter 1
I actually don't know myself... Why don't you see if there is a spot where you put the summary??
Author's Response:
Date: 27 May 2010 6:33 PM Title: Chapter 7
I saw this pic of Bella and though it would make an excellent banner so I did...
Do you like it?? You can use it if you want! It's for you after all!!
<a href="http://s881.photobucket.com/albums/ac13/Marianne_Northman_Cullen/?action=view¤t=Kristen-Stewart-251-1.gif" target="_blank"><img src="http://i881.photobucket.com/albums/ac13/Marianne_Northman_Cullen/Kristen-Stewart-251-1.gif" border="0" alt="Photobucket"></a>
Author's Response:
yea i like it alot thanks so much, but hmmm.... i don't how to put it like in the site and all lol - mili
Date: 27 May 2010 6:18 PM Title: Chapter 1
Nothing I just though I lost it for a sec!! Glad to help!
Date: 25 May 2010 9:34 AM Title: Chapter 7
I like it!! Only one q... When did they get to London?? Aren't they in Voltera??
xoxo
M
Author's Response:
ooops gotta fix it, thanxs - mili
Date: 24 May 2010 7:00 AM Title: Chapter 1
Sure!! That is exactly one of the reasons I am NOT a beta.... I hate changing sth the a writer worked for so hard.... Guilty consience too much I guess....
Date: 23 May 2010 7:08 PM Title: Chapter 1
I don't know actually I've never done it... I usually create outfits and help the writers with the images they project.
As I said not a beta... They are in charge of the chapter! Correct grammar, voc, better phrasing maybe changing a bit the draft (not the plot or the dialogues the way of presentation)
I could just look out for sth you missed more like a pre-read! And in the mean time you can find a real beta!
Author's Response:
i'm not sure i like anyone being in charge my my chapter, so i'll just do it myself. - mili
Date: 23 May 2010 6:51 PM Title: Chapter 1
Nah... I don't mind!! I like the story and wanna see what will happen next!!
Of course I am not a beta but i can help if you want!
I can't wait to get to torture Edward even if it's only a bit! ***winks***
lol
xoxo
M
Author's Response:
well you'll be suprise to find out who will torture Edward. it won't be Bella or the Volturi, but one of the twins. um.... ok i guess you can be my beta person thing how eactly does it work? - mili
Date: 23 May 2010 11:31 AM Title: Chapter 6
Ok now this was better in the pace!!
not that it bothers me but I believe in third line the last word is scream an in Demetris pov third line again is screamed...
It's nothing big I just wanted you to know so that you can correct it if needed!You are a human beign after all!! with all the pressure sth was left from you or your beta! It's ok!
I can't wait to see how Edward is doing!!
xoxo
Marianne
Author's Response:
i don't have a beta if yu haven't notice yet lol yeah i'm a sucky writer i know lol well i can assure you Edward is going to pay for leaving Bella in the woods. - mili
Date: 23 May 2010 11:00 AM Title: Chapter 1
Sorry if I was harsh i didn't mean it!! I just meant that maybe you should slow down... For example when she learns she is pregnant I personally had to do a double take cause the reactions were too fast for me to keep up...
There is nothing bad with it!! I can't wait!
xoxo
marianne
Author's Response:
lol sorry about that. i'm just trying to get to the point which is when Alice and Edward pov would come. you might not wanna read the ch. i'm writting right now, because i'm skipping to the labor and only writting bits and pieces of what happenedduring the last three months. - mili
[Report This]Date: 23 May 2010 3:52 AM Title: Chapter 6
so are they thinking the kids are humna or vampire or both. but they do not know what to expect. this is tril and error. well dr carmen know what to do to deliver 1/2 and 1/2 kids. hmm can't wait
Author's Response:
the twin will be half human and half vampire with unbelieve powers. you well soon find out that Dr Carmen won't be able to deliever the babies, and Caius can't help to see Bella in so much pain, and that's when Aro steps in. - mili
[Report This]Date: 23 May 2010 3:43 AM Title: Chapter 5
well that is funny how all the vampires came in. then smelled that sweet blood. love it
Author's Response:
thanks i hpe you keep reading i will post again tonight- mili
[Report This]Date: 23 May 2010 3:20 AM Title: Chapter 3
so it seems as if they will watch her till she delivers and then change her. wow can't wait to see what happens next
[Report This]Date: 23 May 2010 3:16 AM Title: Chapter 2
wow he heard the heartbeats. hello bella or mama bella. fast thinker on having them change you
[Report This]Date: 23 May 2010 3:08 AM Title: Chapter 1
i am intirgued. wonder why aro seeks her out.
Author's Response:
you will son find out. Aro wants Bella power and he can't wait to see what powers the twins might have
Date: 22 May 2010 8:08 PM Title: Chapter 5
WOW! That's a mil! I like it but for fuck's sake slow down! I had to read it twice to actually get a better picture!!
Too many too fast!!
I really wanna know what happens next so please go on!!
xoxo
M
Author's Response:
hey, um... how exactly do you want me to slow down? it's my first storie just let me know exactly what you mean by slowing down.
i haven't finshed the next ch. yet, it might take a while maybe by monday or tomorrow .
please keep readind and reviewing. - mili
[Report This]Date: 21 May 2010 5:43 AM Title: Chapter 5
cant wait update, so far love this story
Author's Response:
thankss
Date: 20 May 2010 6:01 PM Title: Chapter 5
whoops.... probably should have mentioned the blood draw to the vamps. lol
Author's Response:
lol yeah well i thought it was time for a fight scene so i hope you keep reading. - mili
[Report This]Date: 20 May 2010 4:00 PM Title: Chapter 4
i like the story line so far
Author's Response:
thanks after the next 3 or 4 ch the story is going to get really good. i hope you keep reading - mili
Date: 19 May 2010 3:18 AM Title: Chapter 3
Scary concept! Not only does the love of your life run out on you, but you then wind up in the hands of Aro and Crew only to find you're having twins!! This girl So-o needs a break! Nice work.
Author's Response:
Thanks for the review. theres going to be lots of drama lots fightting. twins will have amazing powers. Edward will be coming up soon in the next few ch. may be the next two. i hope you keep reading and reviewing. - mili
Date: 19 May 2010 2:56 AM Title: Chapter 3
GET A BETA!!!!!!!!!!!!
Author's Response:
um... whats beta? -mili
Date: 17 May 2010 6:07 AM Title: Chapter 1
this could be intresting ill keep reading
Author's Response:
thanks for the review. i hope you do keep reading. story will get better. - mili