Date: 07 Dec 2013 10:48 AM Title: Chapter 24
That looks like a good way to start a whole new life, dumping the thing that's weighing you down. I liked Edward's epiphany that Bella was smart enough to make up her own mind what to do with her life. He may not be perfect, by any means, but she wants him just the way he is.
Date: 07 Dec 2013 10:36 AM Title: Chapter 23
That was a slick deal Edward made with Carlos! Bella really has a gift for helping them out of trouble, and he doesn't do a bad job of bluffing, either! Boy, that was a close thing! I about had a fit when the bastard pushed Bella in the room with a gun to her head! Luck was sure on their side this time!
Date: 07 Dec 2013 9:25 AM Title: Chapter 20
All this snooping around is apt to have Mala breathing down their necks! I hope Edward has his gun on him, I have a bad feeling he may need it! Poor Phil, he really was falling for Renee, it's a shame the bad guys took her from him! I hope he keeps his mouth shut about Bella!
Date: 07 Dec 2013 8:52 AM Title: Chapter 19
So, definitely a cover-up! Looks like it goes as high as the police captain, who told the me's supervisor who in turn told the me. If anyone had returned Marlene's calls it would soon have become apparent that suicide was not the proper ruling! I still am curious, what did Renee know that got her shot?
Date: 07 Dec 2013 8:11 AM Title: Chapter 17
It's beginning to look like Renee had some information she shouldn't have had and Mala made sure she would never use it! I'm so glad Bella had Edward with her when she went back to her mom's place. I'm not happy that he lied to her , but maybe he'll tell her the truth before long. He's forgotten how she can see possibilities that he misses, and how she can practically read his mind!
Date: 07 Dec 2013 7:32 AM Title: Chapter 16
I get a feeling that Bella wouldn't necessarily be that opposed to Edward killing Mala, for a couple reasons. First he murdered her mother, then he kidnapped her, thinking to use her for a while, and thirdly, he's a creepy, psychotic criminal! Pretty good reasons, I think! I hope Edward has faith in her! If he can discover why Mala killed Renee, then he needs to hide Bella and the place I thought of that no one else i.e., the bad guys,! would is with Carlisle and Esme
Date: 07 Dec 2013 7:01 AM Title: Chapter 15
That was so touching when Bella whispered that she wished Harold was her grandfather! I'm smiling at the lie Edward told to bolster his story about vacationing in Mexico! I remember Bella telling about the boring boyfriend who was studying to be an optometrist! It is a good sign that Edward has opened up a little about his past, I have hope for this pair!
Date: 07 Dec 2013 5:07 AM Title: Chapter 14
I was wondering when that solution would occur to him!, If he gets rid of the one big threat then they won't have to live in fear, looking over their shoulders the rest of their days! Harold has turned out to be a veritable godsend, what a cool old guy!
Date: 07 Dec 2013 4:54 AM Title: Chapter 13
That's a really good plan, if they can fet Harold to help them out! It will probably appeal to the old guy, he's got a strange outlook on life, after all! I wonder if Edward will ever feel that Bella loves him as he love her?
Date: 07 Dec 2013 4:23 AM Title: Chapter 11
With the way Edward feels about her, it was probably inevitable that this would happen, since Bella has feelings for him too! It would be really great if they didn't have the threat of Mala hanging over them. That part is still pretty much up in the air!
Date: 07 Dec 2013 4:06 AM Title: Chapter 10
I wonder what that little smile on Bella's face is supposed to mean? This was a pleasant little interlude with Harold and August on the beach. I'm glad they found their way there, and I'm glad that Edward is falling for Bella. Figured it had to be that, otherwise why would he care what happens to her?
Date: 07 Dec 2013 3:43 AM Title: Chapter 9
Lord, what a thing to happen, both legs broken at the same time! The poor thing, and poor you having to watch over him ! I would be tearing out my hair! Now, about this story! UI think I really like Harold, he's sure a different old man! Bella, the wanna-be vet, probably likes his dog, August. I'm glad they are going to stay with Harold for a couple days, and even more glad that Mala sent the money, I think. Edward could be right, that it's just to lull him into a false sense of security. Hard to know, for sure!
Date: 07 Dec 2013 3:08 AM Title: Chapter 7
So, honeymoon in Mexico, huh? As good a cover story as any, and better than some. The biggest problem will be getting back into the states again, not an easy task with no i.d.! I trust these two to come up with a way to do it!
Date: 07 Dec 2013 2:54 AM Title: Chapter 6
These two really work well together. They are both smart, logical, and in her case especially , intuitive. Go where the bad guys won't be expecting you, throw them off the scent as it were! Sounds like a plan, if they can get over the border.
Date: 07 Dec 2013 1:36 AM Title: Chapter 5
It took a while for the lightbulb to come on, but it looks like Edward has figured out why the police report was so screwed up! Mala has "friends" in the police department who, for a price, would file a false report! They have gone to so much trouble to make it look like she's dead, now is no time to let them know she's still alive!
Date: 07 Dec 2013 12:51 AM Title: Chapter 4
Oh yes, I like Juanita, she seems to be on the side of the angels in this deal! It's going to be a damn tricky situation and I hope they can pull this off without getting killed! I'm like Bella, I can't imagine why Mala would have murdered Bella's mother. I'm also not real sure why Bella would trust Edward to get her out of this mess. Maybe because he's in as much trouble as she is if he crosses Mala!
Date: 07 Dec 2013 12:25 AM Title: Chapter 3
This guy, Rico/Mala, is a cold-blooded bastard if ever there was one! Edward has got himself into a real mess with this "job"! I can already tell he's not going to kill Bella, but that's going to put the both of them in danger. After all, if you're not with him, you are a "loose end"! Love to know what kind of threat a hundred pound girl is to Mr. Tough Drug Dealer, that he wants her dead?
Date: 06 Dec 2013 11:40 PM Title: Chapter 2
So, Juanita is watching Bella for someone, someone she's afraid of, evidently. This whole encounter was strange, the night, the breakfast and the bike repair. Why does he want to linger and why does she look so hopeless? Can't wait to find out!
Date: 29 Jul 2012 3:07 PM Title: Epilogue
Thank you again for another beautifully written story. You are so skilled at balancing acts: the exposition of a crime plot that doesn't get bogged down in details, or veer towards gratuitous gore, or even melodramatic silliness; the gentle humor and playfulness that develops between Bella and Edward... moving along their love story by example vs. description (yay!), in the midst of all the tension that surrounds them as they are on the run. The image of Harold strolling down the beach in an old sundress is one that I will pull out on a rainy day when I need a good belly laugh. Seriously, though, every "side" character you introduce is believable and necessary, and makes the story seem that much tighter.
No pressure, but I can only hope that you will be inspired to write more & to write often. The dynamics between your Edwards and your Bellas are some of my favorites that I've ever read in ff, and I've fallen in love with them as easily and as naturally as they fell for each other.
Well, it's obvious that I am certainly a fan of your fiction. Cheers to you!
Date: 18 Jul 2012 6:45 AM Title: Chapter 9
I have been trying to give this story a chance and it seemed really interesting until I realized that you are writing Edward and Bella as only friends. Or at least that is what I think. I mean if there are no lemons or even kissing then really I dont think you should rate it as NC 17. I skipped to chapter 14 and I still didn't see any sparks fly with these two. So I must say that I cant continue as it just is not exciting enough without the lemons. Sorry.
Date: 04 Jun 2012 9:24 PM Title: Epilogue
good story new to the site this is the first one ive read enjoyed it but the spacing made it difficult to read sometimes
You know, you're right. I haven't been reading the chapters after I put them up, and I just realized the spacing's weird. I'll have to see if I can fix it; it's annoying as all get out. Thanks for letting me know, and I'm glad you enjoyed the story.