Login
Register a New Account


Follow Us
      

Reviews For Early Intervention
You must login (register a new account) to review.
Reviewer: k1942 Signed [Report This]
Date: 30 Jun 2014 1:31 AM Title: Chapter 48

I knew damn well that red-eyed nomad was going to show up and cause pain and misery one more time! Poor Bella, it's just one damn thing after another with her rotten luck!

Reviewer: renee aubin Signed [Report This]
Date: 25 Jun 2014 5:11 AM Title: Chapter 47

Uh oh:  ‘Harry looked to have aged a decade since Charlie had last seen him, which was only a few days before... Charlie worried for his friend, his health wasn't the best. ... if the man lived out the year he would be lucky.'  Having his son AND daughter phase had to be traumatic.

Yeah, the tribe must have wondered this, as Harry did:  ‘Why [Leah] had phased and what that meant to the tribe. ...Was the whole tribe going to end up as wolves? ... would there BE a next generation if no one aged and so couldn't carry a child to term?'

Ouch:  ‘[Leah] didn't yet realise that if Emily died, Sam would soon follow. As soon as they all phased at the same time, she would though.'  That's only going to make Leah feel worse.

Well said:  ‘...the joint mind especially gave Edward what could be described as a mix between a headache and strained eyesight.' 

I snickered that Bella remembers leaving the oven on.  They really don't need another problem right about now.  Not at all amusing though that the kitchen is covered in Emily's blood.

Clever thought, to have the wolves take a photo of any unidentified nomad and check with the Cullens.  I wonder if the wolves were a little surprised at Bella's knowledge about "burning the pieces".

Interesting thoughts from Paul:  ‘"I mean this house is great and all, but hardly a palace, and they all go to school, why is that?" Edward could tell that the others all agreed, the tribe had long been trying to figure out why the Cullen's acted as they did.'

Good point:  ‘The fact that Jacob had been unable to understand Bella's attitude before and was suddenly confronted with his own reluctance to accept [cell phones] allowed Edward to understand even better than if he just had been able to read Bella to start with.'  As out of touch with "normal" humans as the Cullens are, it's also good for them to see that someone else thinks like Bella does.

I like that Edward has really learned his lesson about not making decisions for Bella.  For instance, ‘Edward was uneasy the whole time [Sam] was close to her, this was... after all... the wolf who had hurt his own imprint through losing his temper.'  But he keeps his mouth shut.

I love Charlie's idea of paying the pack for their peacekeeping duties.  And that ‘It was the longest speech anyone except Bella had ever heard Charlie make... ever.'

Good thing Jacob was there to talk Bella out of feeling guilty for Emily's injury.  She wouldn't have listened to Edward.  And this is certainly true:  "Emily could have got hurt miles away from any help. At least as it was she got to a doctor fast."  And a doctor who wouldn't report her odd injuries.

 

Reviewer: csp4 Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: 16 Jun 2014 8:16 PM Title: Chapter 47

"Seth was just the opposite, though he too had only phased for the first time that day it was obvious to Edward that he had full control of himself" Interesting. Only hours old. Gotta love that Seth:) Wonderful character

Reviewer: sonogal Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: 16 Jun 2014 5:23 PM Title: Chapter 47

I am so glad that the Wolves are open to some help. They do work very hard for their tribe.

Reviewer: k1942 Signed [Report This]
Date: 15 Jun 2014 12:11 AM Title: Chapter 47

What an exhausting day, for all concerned, with Emily's injuries and Leah's phasing and all the turmoil surrounding them! At least some good came out of the mess, with Bella's idea about phones and convincing the wolves to accept some help through money donated to the council! Now, if the pack could catch the nomad that started all this, it would be perfect!

Reviewer: aabc Signed [Report This]
Date: 14 Jun 2014 9:58 PM Title: Chapter 47

Hmmm, I guess I understand her guilt, but hope she can put it behind her soon.

i wonder where those nomads went?  More as soon as you have time please.

Reviewer: theladykt Signed [Report This]
Date: 14 Jun 2014 8:44 PM Title: Chapter 47

Great arguements from B and Charlie.

Reviewer: Camilla11 Signed [Report This]
Date: 14 Jun 2014 6:34 PM Title: Chapter 47

It is so heartwarming to see wolves getting reasonable.

Reviewer: renee aubin Signed [Report This]
Date: 08 Jun 2014 7:31 PM Title: Chapter 46

Good job describing Edward's panic when he hears Bella has been injured but has no details.

Excellent description, too, of how Emily's injury affected the whole pack - of course it would.  Scary warning from Charlie to Edward:  ‘be careful Sam is just outside, he may be dangerous in that state.'  And poor Sam: He could not find the calm he needed to change back into a human...'

Interesting:  ‘...the rather lupine tainted smell of Emily's [blood]'.  And later ‘Carlisle briefly considered whether [a transfusion] was safe, as the girl wasn't actually 100% human any more.'

Funny but not:  Carlisle's ‘study is set up as a small hospital." They hadn't changed it back since Bella was last in need, just in case she ever needed it again, with her track record it was almost certain she would at some time.'  Turns out to be lucky for Emily.  Jasper would be proud of how Edward took charge to solve the puzzle of how to get Emily to Carlisle. 

Aww, sweet scene of Edward comforting Bella when they get back to the Cullen house. 

Nicely phrased:  ‘the huge wolf that was sometimes a 14 year old boy'.  And I like that Esme is concerned for the newest wolves: "You are just all so young."

Wow, Jacob has manners!  ‘"May we come in?" Jacob asked, one of his hands firmly holding Sam's shoulder to stop him barging through the Cullen house.'  And then "Paul! If you can't stop yourself being rude, leave!"

What a dramatic moment when Leah shows up, unrecognized by the rest of the pack.  Poor baby:  ‘...this is the first time she has phased and she doesn't know what is happening to her. One of you needs to go out there and change and calm her down before she injures herself.'

This made me smile, when Jacob strips and transforms to help Leah:  ‘[Bella] smiled to herself when she realised Edward's shoes were there, meaning he had stood in the way so she couldn't see anything.'

Good one:  ‘"I don't understand." [Sam] said as he came in, "whoever she is she doesn't like me much!"

"The trouble is that she actually loves you." Edward said sadly.'

Of course poor Leah will know all about Sam injuring Emily from the pack mind.  And Seth reacts like a typical little brother!

And in all of this the nomad got away, and we don't even know who he is!

 

Reviewer: csp4 Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: 08 Jun 2014 5:33 AM Title: Chapter 46

"....both he and Bella stripped to their underwear, before she finally opened her eyes. She looked at him, then at herself, and then again at him, and blushed violently." lol lol lol
"...before he stripped off his shorts and began to transform. Bella blushed and looked quickly at the carpet" lol lol I can't get enough of this Bella::))

Reviewer: campyrs2 Signed [Report This]
Date: 08 Jun 2014 3:29 AM Title: Chapter 46

Great chapter!  Thank you.

Reviewer: theladykt Signed [Report This]
Date: 07 Jun 2014 9:50 PM Title: Chapter 46

Glad they were there to help Emily.  LOL.  Poor Seth.  Hope Leah finds an imprint to help her overall mood.

Reviewer: sonogal Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: 05 Jun 2014 7:56 PM Title: Chapter 46

I loved this chapter.

Reviewer: princessjustine Signed [Report This]
Date: 05 Jun 2014 3:26 PM Title: Chapter 46

If I hadn't already added this story to my list of favorites I would have done it with that last line alone, too funny!

Reviewer: 10of15 Signed [Report This]
Date: 05 Jun 2014 12:01 PM Title: Chapter 46

great chapter.  from the end of the prior chapter, I thought Bella was badly hurt.  Poor Leah.

Reviewer: Holidai Signed [Report This]
Date: 04 Jun 2014 10:19 PM Title: Chapter 46

This chapter was really terrific.  Sad but hopeful and very good.

Reviewer: k1942 Signed [Report This]
Date: 04 Jun 2014 10:14 PM Title: Chapter 46

I never doubted that Carlisle and Edward could care for Emily's wounds, but that was quite a mess for a short while! Once Sam was more controlled and assured his imprint would recover, it was a lot calmer, until Leah showed up in wolf form. Kind of felt sorry for Seth!  I'm also concerned about that red-eyed nomad caught staring in Bella's window, especially since the wolves couldn't catch him before he escaped into the sea!

Reviewer: artri Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: 04 Jun 2014 11:33 AM Title: Chapter 46

Perfectly done, great chapter.

Reviewer: Camilla11 Signed [Report This]
Date: 04 Jun 2014 7:14 AM Title: Chapter 46

Great chapters about the "accident" and the wolves dynamics!

Reviewer: renee aubin Signed [Report This]
Date: 04 Jun 2014 5:00 AM Title: Chapter 45

Oh dear, Renee just keeps making things worse for herself.  I agree with Edward, "I don't even want to remind Bella she exists."

Hmm, I like that the Cullens have to dig a little to find out if the latest "animal" victim was really killed by a vampire. They can't possibly know everything that happens in the area the second it happens.

Sweet moment for Esme:  ‘They found her sat on the sofa, a peaceful smile on her face as she regarded the sleeping girl with her head on her lap.'

This made me smile:  ‘Edward grimaced. Just because he didn't want to discuss [their sex life], didn't mean his family didn't.'

Good explanation for Bella's aversion to shopping:  "at the moment she feels guilty because she sees it as us running down the way she has lived so far, and she is trying not to be offended with our generosity."

I always thought it was sort of ridiculous that canon never mentioned the issue of menstruation around vampires, especially with a school full of young women.

Fun bit of banter when he's about to drive her home - they really are learning each other.

A cute way of expressing Bella's cluelessness about sports:  ‘She frowned as Jacob gave a loud cheer, evidently someone had scored a goal, or a run, or something.'  This was fun, too, from Emily, re the infamous "flat screen": "Anyone would think we didn't have a TV anywhere on the reservation..."

A sad idea, re Sam and Emily:  "Leah just went postal, she kicked me out of the house and Uncle Harry won't let us tell her what happened." Not only does Emily get the blame, but Leah must feel even worse.

Yikes, so both Emily and Bella were hurt?   The nomad indirectly causes terrible damage without even being in the room - and without even the advantage of Alice being able to see that Carlisle and Edward are needed!

 

Reviewer: Ashmerlin Signed starstarstarstarhalf-star [Report This]
Date: 02 Jun 2014 3:46 PM Title: Chapter 45

Loved it! More please! but no cliffies at the end please?

Reviewer: csp4 Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: 01 Jun 2014 6:49 AM Title: Chapter 45

Damn! Bella's hurt - stomach shot:( Looks like there might not be a little bundle of joy for E & B.
The description of Emily's wounds sound nasty. Double damn!
Edward will*not*be*happy

Reviewer: theladykt Signed [Report This]
Date: 31 May 2014 10:58 PM Title: Chapter 45

Oh no poor Emily

Reviewer: nnalday Signed [Report This]
Date: 31 May 2014 10:33 PM Title: Chapter 45

Oh no! What happened? Please update soon.

Reviewer: k1942 Signed [Report This]
Date: 31 May 2014 9:51 PM Title: Chapter 45

Thank God Jacob and Sam were there, though it didn't keep blood from being spilled! Edward is going to go ballistic, not being there to save his wife from harm! Hope someone turns off the oven so the house doesn't burn down!

Reviewer: asam75 Signed [Report This]
Date: 31 May 2014 6:26 PM Title: Chapter 45

I was just wondering about this Emily and her facial scarring while Bella was describing her looks.  I noticed that she didn't have any.  And then, there the scene is.

However, I am sick of Bella thinking that she is invincable.  Yeah, I know that she's young, but she knows about vampires and werewolves.  She can't begin to think that she can defend herself against them.  She's exhibiting more hubris than Billy and his belief in the strength of wolves.

Good job...thanks.

Reviewer: Camilla11 Signed [Report This]
Date: 31 May 2014 2:45 PM Title: Chapter 45

So here is the famous Sam/Emily accident.

Reviewer: aabc Signed [Report This]
Date: 31 May 2014 12:52 PM Title: Chapter 45

OMG, poor Emily!  I hope they can get Carlisle there to help her.  I hope the wolves catch the nomad!  Sam is going to feel terrible...

Reviewer: LilCullen454 Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: 31 May 2014 12:15 PM Title: Chapter 45

Oh SHIT!!!!

Reviewer: csp4 Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: 26 May 2014 9:41 PM Title: Chapter 44

"Edward has bought her a new car… it's black." lol I'm not quite that bad but close::))
"Esme was determined that she was going to try every single flavour of ice-cream before she was changed!" Bella's going to be a little pudgy by the time she's changed::))

Reviewer: Ellachanted Signed [Report This]
Date: 26 May 2014 6:45 PM Title: Chapter 27

I guess punching Mike in the nose would cause brain damage?  :)

Reviewer: Ellachanted Signed [Report This]
Date: 26 May 2014 1:50 AM Title: Chapter 18

Okay what is an RTA?  Most of the Britishisms I've seen before. I'm assuming some kind of auto accident?   

 

And the suit? Yeah, normally Alice would be right. But not a small town sports store. 

Reviewer: Ellachanted Signed [Report This]
Date: 25 May 2014 3:34 PM Title: Chapter 13

Sorry, I'm really crappy at reviewing. But the next chapter button is much too tempting. ;)

Reviewer: Ellachanted Signed [Report This]
Date: 25 May 2014 4:47 AM Title: Chapter 4

LOL! I am enjoying your story, but the Britishisms are a bit funny to me. We have substitute teachers and principals (not headmasters) and people rarely eat scones, though they might have a biscuit (not to be confused with a cookie)  And there is no "tea" though sometimes I wouldn't mind it myself. 

Other than that sort of thing, it's a really enjoyable story.  Reminds me a bit of Frances Hodgson Burnett's writing. ;)

Reviewer: Holidai Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: 24 May 2014 8:57 PM Title: Chapter 44

I am so glad Alice was not in fact evil.  I admit, I worried for a bit.  I hope the ladies can all find something to do together that they will all enjoy.  Or maybe they can take turns?  I dunno.  Regardless, I loved this chapter!  This story is so delightful.

I do wonder if Bella would have married a wolf but would not have been his imprint.  Or maybe this is the way of saying the universe changes and adapts along with it's inhabitants?  Regardless, loved, loved, loved. :D

Reviewer: theladykt Signed [Report This]
Date: 23 May 2014 6:45 AM Title: Chapter 44

Glad everyone realizes their mistakes.

 

Reviewer: renee aubin Signed [Report This]
Date: 23 May 2014 6:05 AM Title: Chapter 44

Yaay, ‘Emmett was angry that Bella had been pushed to such an extreme and hoped he could help make her decide to stay.'  Nice touch that ‘she reminded him of his youngest and favourite sister from his human family'.

Interesting:  ‘Bella was more of a daughter to [Esme] than either Alice or Rose, who had both come to her when full grown.'  It makes good sense too that Carlisle wants to take a more active role in the family's decisions ‘rather than allow the visions to dictate the family's every move.'

 I like that Alice ‘was genuinely upset that she had made Bella cry and truly hadn't realised just how domineering she was.'  I'm glad you didn't paint her as a self-centered control freak.  Actually, with her gift it would be hard to avoid the tendency to try to control everything. 

Oh, intriguing that ‘though [Alice] had known that Mike Newton was never really a threat, she knew that someone WAS. She just had never been able to see who it was... Now, with her knowing about the wolves interfering with her vision she wondered whether it was one of them that Bella would have gotten attached to so much that she would avoid the Cullens entirely, making the mating bond not form.'  Please don't make me want to murder Jacob again!

Interesting idea that "we can stand being a bit further apart now, [the bond] sort of knows we aren't going to part."  That's a relief.  Fun that Bella actually flirts with Edward: "Maybe we should try strengthening it again?"  The effect of her unintentionally slow striptease was good, too.  Makes sense that she doesn't want her wardrobe destroyed.

A surprising reminder:  ‘It was only a couple of days ago that she hadn't wanted him to see her naked in the shower.'  Delicious description of their lovemaking.  ‘The deeper he went the more he needed to get even deeper.'  A uniquely human experience for him, ‘If he did not know better he would say that he was exhausted too.' 

Sweet that Alice provided the electric blanket for them.

 

Yes, certainly someone who appears to be 17 would be treated exactly like that by car salesmen.  I like your description that ‘Edward just stared at the salesman until he broke out into a sweat...'  (Hmm, were there any saleswomen?  That would present a whole different problem.)

I laughed out loud at Bella's answer when Rosalie asks her what car they chose:  ‘"Erm, you know, I can't remember, except it's black?" She shrugged apologetically.'  Hilarious how that sole detail gets passed onto Alice and then Esme.  Another good Rosalie line: "What, like the Model T?"  And then "Ok, Pixie, I give up, what the hell has he bought?"  Wonderful!  How fun that she teases Rosalie by only specifying that for her "after" car "I was thinking of a red one."

I like Alice's description of how they hide their connections to all that money.  Good job.

Oh damn, I hated that stupid Guardian car in canon.  Somehow it's a little less obnoxious here, I imagine if this Bella really didn't want it she'd make that stick.

Sad but true:  ‘She clearly remembered the girls at her old school in Phoenix. The better the car they drove the nastier they were.'

And yaay, the Cullen women catch on that Bella gets bored by researching cars on-line!  Good for her, being honest about it.

 

This made me smile:  ‘If Emmett mentioned anything [about her period] when he got back she would die!'  I wouldn't put it past him, either.

Amusing that ‘she didn't want to know how many movie companies they owned.'  And I loved the Fassbender/Wasikowska version of Jane Eyre!  Have you ever seen the 4-hour Timothy Dalton one?  Yumm!

Hmm, surely Edward will get back before the movie is over, so she can cuddle with him too!

 

Reviewer: renee aubin Signed [Report This]
Date: 23 May 2014 5:21 AM Title: Chapter 43

A nice observation:  ‘She guessed that in floor space [the cottage] wasn't much larger than the Black house, but the difference was astounding.'

Impressive that B&E can have a pleasant conversation after she spends time with Jacob, so unlike canon.  Sweet that he has a fire and a hot cup of tea waiting for her, equally sweet that she wants to take HIS car to go see the family.

Hmm, Edward makes a good point that they have to be careful how they offer to help out the res financially.

A good resolution re Alice - Edward is wise to clearly choose his wife over his sister.  Good answer: "We need her, she will have to organise everything. As long as she doesn't try and organise me I'm ok."

Well thought out discussion about how to help the tribe.  ‘...with the secrets the tribe was keeping the one thing they could not afford was more people in the area.'  And duh - Jasper figures out that "We need Charlie" for ideas.  Funny observation about the strict male/female division re the crafts.  Aww, touching that Charlie is proud of Bella for wanting to help.

Yaay, no more school for E&B.

 

Reviewer: renee aubin Signed [Report This]
Date: 23 May 2014 5:02 AM Title: Chapter 42

Very well done conversation between Bella and Jacob!

Huh, I never thought about the long-term outcome of the wolves not aging while actively phasing - the reason Taha Aki may have had a "third wife" is that he outlived the first two!  Since wolves don't have the option to "turn" their imprints, it's practically a guarantee of a very sad ending.

Ooh, very legend-y:  Taha Aki ‘left the tribe and returned to the forest home of the wolves. His young sons would occasionally report to the tribe that they had seen him...'   

The story about the whole pack going mad with grief when one member accidentally killed another's imprint - so tragic, but the consequence makes sense.

More good wolf backstory: "The pack that went mad was my grandfather's. They were the last to phase until Sam, we had been 27 years without guardians..."  While the Cullens were gone, of course.

Now this makes good sense: "Yeah, that's why we all decided to allow you to be changed. No one wants a vampire mad with grief in the area..."  Not so much out of compassion, but fear for the tribe and other humans.

Excellent line for Jacob: "Myths or legends please! Not fairies!"

This is a good point too:  "Can you imagine what would happen around here if the story of giant wolves got out? The farmers already try and kill all the normal wolves they can find so they don't prey on their livestock."

Hah, a Rosalie-Emmett moment among the pack:  ‘"She's the leech's lover?" Sam, a step in front paused and turned to slap him around the back of his head.'

I like your observation that there isn't much money to be had on the reservation, especially since Sam's alpha responsibilities preclude holding down a job.  Very evocative that ‘She had supposed [their truck] was an abandoned wreck'.  Great idea that ‘she had a new project for the Cullen millions.'  After her childhood struggles to make ends meet, she can definitely empathize.

This Jacob is so reasonable:  "If what Charlie told us is right then the Cullens killed a pair of leeches a few months ago that could have wiped us all out ... back then there was only Sam, not even Paul and Jared had phased, he would have been slaughtered."  I liked that he's so impressed that Bella was there that day, when Edward first arrived.

 

Excellent that she thinks about her reaction to the wolves' truck:  ‘She guessed Edward felt the same way about her in her truck as she did about them in that one. Even more, because she was his mate. She sighed. She really had been a brat.'  Good girl.

Reviewer: artri Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: 22 May 2014 11:24 PM Title: Chapter 44

Still loving this story.

Reviewer: k1942 Signed [Report This]
Date: 22 May 2014 9:48 PM Title: Chapter 44

I saw that version of Jane Eyre and really enjoyed it, I'll bet Bella did too! Everyone has turned over a new leaf, including Bella, and they are trying hard to really get along. Should make life better for all concerned, it is what makes family life so much easier when everyone tries to be nicer!

Reviewer: sonogal Signed [Report This]
Date: 20 May 2014 12:28 PM Title: Chapter 43

Part of the Native American problem is that they have not been educated to keep up with the changing times. They could learn home repair and construction. They could build homes all over the area. They know how to do auto repair. Why not open a shop on the edge of the reservation and advertise? Farming and fishing isn't viable for their community anymore. If they are going to survive, they need to modify what they consider careers for their young men.

Reviewer: csp4 Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: 20 May 2014 2:07 AM Title: Chapter 43

The visit with Jake was a great idea:) It looks like this 'project' will have the added benefit of helping Bella heal. Hope the tribe doesn't figure out the Cullen's are involved. A thought provoking chapter.

Reviewer: theladykt Signed [Report This]
Date: 19 May 2014 1:07 AM Title: Chapter 43

wonderful ideas

Reviewer: campyrs2 Signed [Report This]
Date: 18 May 2014 5:50 PM Title: Chapter 43

Great story.  I'm loving it!

Reviewer: Holidai Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: 17 May 2014 3:16 AM Title: Chapter 43

What a lovely chapter. :D

Reviewer: k1942 Signed [Report This]
Date: 16 May 2014 11:17 PM Title: Chapter 43

Bella just had to start thnking of other people's problems to get over her stubborn resistance to spending money. She won't mind spending it on someone other than herself. It's a very nice thing to do and always makes the giver feel at least as good as the recipient! Charlie and all the Cullens had some pretty good ideas of how to help.

Reviewer: artri Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: 16 May 2014 8:54 PM Title: Chapter 43

A good one...

Reviewer: Camilla11 Signed [Report This]
Date: 16 May 2014 8:48 PM Title: Chapter 43

I liked this chapter a lot. It delves in very serious matters.

Reviewer: romance4me2 Signed [Report This]
Date: 16 May 2014 8:24 PM Title: Chapter 43

Great chapter!

Reviewer: renee aubin Signed [Report This]
Date: 16 May 2014 2:03 AM Title: Chapter 41

Hmm, interesting question, re the pain from a strained mate bond:  ‘...it pulsed in her body, keeping pace with her heartbeat. Every nerve ending was on fire with it. Was this what she would suffer in the change?'

It's brave of you to say that Bella feels smothered by Edward:  ‘She loved him so much that it hurt sometimes... But it wasn't enough, she was suffocating.'  And ‘It was too late for her to retreat into childhood now.'  That's right, all of the Cullens need to learn this.

Oh yaay, she has gotten through to him:  "I won't force you into anything or stop you from doing anything you want, just come back to me. Alice isn't allowed anywhere near you unless you say you want to see her!"

Snicker, ‘Having the same argument every 7 days for the rest of eternity didn't appeal to her.'

 

Well said:

"I didn't promise, I said it would be a long time before it happened and then distracted you. I would not promise Bella, I can't live in a world where you don't exist."

Whoa, they're definitely taking her seriously. "Bella, you have to think about yourself. If living with us is as bad as Renée was, then you MUST leave. Edward will take you anywhere you want to go, for as long as you need."  I'm impressed that Carlisle even offers to move the rest of the family away so she can be alone with Edward but near Charlie!

Nice:  ‘He held up the plaid shirt that had started the argument earlier and when she smiled slightly at him he beamed broadly as if she had given him the world.'  I was surprised she wasn't more excited to have her own clothes back - that was quite a victory.  Great idea:  ‘maybe Rose and Esme would like to go shopping with her? To buy the sort of clothes SHE liked?'

This made me smile:  ‘She didn't remember deciding to stay with Edward, but the mating bond seemed to think she had and the pain was no longer present.'

I enjoyed your Jacob, playful and light hearted, and a good representative of his tribe.  Very interesting: "Most of the tribe still think that the spirit warriors are just myth, we don't want them to know any different."

I liked Jacob's reaction to her question about resisting the imprint: "NO!" he almost gasped in shock, "Why on earth would anyone try and refuse true love? Total love?"  And he's smart enough to figure out she's struggling with her own "imprint". 

Aww, even sadder than canon: "The thing is, no one in Leah's family has phased, and her father wouldn't allow us to tell her what happened, so she was one bitter woman!" 

This made me laugh out loud, but it makes sense:  "Sam is whipped, I mean REALLY whipped."  So Emily's the alpha over the alpha wolf!

 

 

 

 

 

Reviewer: renee aubin Signed [Report This]
Date: 14 May 2014 5:30 AM Title: Chapter 40

You've really done a good job outlining Bella's desperate tantrum, and how it realigns the whole family system.  I found it ironic that Edward, who had himself been a victim of Alice's steamrolling ways, still somehow bought into the family's blithe tolerance of her.  It took some courageous pushback from Bella to open his eyes, that what Alice had done to Bella was no more acceptable than what she had done to him all those years ago.  Apparently Alice has some growing up to do.  And thank goodness for Esme's clear sight and staunch support!

For starters, it's lucky Edward had the sense not to push Bella any further while they're running around in the truck. 

Good explanation for how it came about that Bella was in the position of having to finish high school a second time, ultimately because Charlie had to be seen to uphold the rules of the community, however arbitrary they might be.  Interesting that "I'm no longer your legal guardian, I signed over the right to that when I allowed you to marry underage."

This made me smile, at the police station:  ‘She ignored Edward, even though she could feel him watching her every move as he sat at her side. She did notice her father looking at them both a couple of times, and was almost sure she caught Edward giving him a shrug out of the corner of her eye.'

Good one:  ‘She didn't know which was worse, vampires or men! And vampire men... well!'

Well said:  "The courts say I'm legally an adult and well able to care for myself, which by the way I have been doing for almost 10 years! But still you don't trust me enough to allow me out of your sight."

Oh, and here's the turning point:  "if you try and stop me I may not come back!"  A threat / intention like that fires up the sense of losing the bond, strongly enough to threaten her health and certainly enough to scare Edward. 

Good dad, Charlie, insisting on carrying unconscious Bella himself instead of letting Edward take over, because clearly she wouldn't have wanted that.

Geez, I want to throttle Edward, although I guess he is honestly puzzled:  "Why though? They are just clothes."  Esme sets him straight, doesn't she?  ‘...his mother filled her voice with a 'give me strength' tone.'  She totally gets it. 

Excellent point:  "If being sensible wasn't getting your attention is it any wonder that she tried the method her mother used to such good effect for so many years and threw a tantrum?"

Another terrific insight:  "[Bella's clothes] were chosen, if you consider it, for her to fade into the background. Nondescript, and plain. ... They hid her shape so she didn't get the attention of any boys and the girls wouldn't feel jealous of her. Alice, basically, took away her armour and planned to put her into the spotlight."

Clever having Edward think about his mother and father, and how he retained the attitudes he grew up with.  I like your idea that Carlisle had lived long enough to recognize how arbitrary any given era's attitudes can be, and Jasper had lived in a time when the social fabric had come apart because of the war.  This made me smile:  ‘Edward groaned and leant his head against the car window. He was his father! The trouble was, Bella was not his mother.'

Yaay!  ‘He had asked why she fought him several times, maybe Esme was right and he should be asking why he was trying to control her every move instead?'

Oh, I didn't see that coming, Edward considering that he and Bella might be better off separating from the family.  It gave me the creeps when he and Esme questioned whether Alice had entirely pure intentions in leaving Bella with Renee as long as they did.  I did enjoy that he was pissed enough at Alice to crush his phone rather than check her text.

And since he is now insisting on consulting with Bella before making any further decisions, Alice won't be able to see how this turns out.  It will drive her crazy!

 

Reviewer: sonogal Signed [Report This]
Date: 13 May 2014 6:11 PM Title: Chapter 42

I guess we have to thank Jacob for giving Bella a wake up call.

Reviewer: k1942 Signed [Report This]
Date: 13 May 2014 3:50 AM Title: Chapter 42

A most edifying little session with young Jacob! This was all stuff Bella needed to hear and think about! I would imagine it cast a new light on a lot of things Bella had been so stubbornly sure of! It's tough seeing another point of view sometimes, I guess! Then again, it is a part of growing up!

Reviewer: theladykt Signed [Report This]
Date: 10 May 2014 3:33 AM Title: Chapter 42

Nice talk with Jake.

Reviewer: goldseadragon Signed [Report This]
Date: 10 May 2014 3:09 AM Title: Chapter 42

Even if Alice wanted Bella to wear newer clothing, she had no right to throw Bella's old clothing away. Just pack it in boxes and store it in the attic, for heaven's sake!

Reviewer: csp4 Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: 09 May 2014 10:29 PM Title: Chapter 42

"...she took a dagger that was on the shore for gutting fish and stabbed herself in the heart..." This part of the legend has always bugged me. All the 3rd wife had to do was slice open her arm to get the blood flowing.

"She really had been a brat" Hmm, not so sure. Alice was a major brat. Bella had righteous indignation:) Esme seemed to be the only one that 'got it'

Going to La Push turned out to be a great thing for Bella. She figured things out, got perspective & found a project:)

Reviewer: Camilla11 Signed [Report This]
Date: 09 May 2014 7:41 PM Title: Chapter 42

Very enlightening conversation for Bella. She now should be much less childish.

About the Third Wife: the story never convinced me. Why sìdid she plant the knife in her heart. Had she done it to her harm the blood would have distracted the vampire all the same and the wife would have survived.

Reviewer: renee aubin Signed [Report This]
Date: 05 May 2014 4:41 AM Title: Chapter 39

Yikes:  ‘Alice had told her that if Edward continued being stubborn that eventually his inner beast would take control again, and this time she would not survive it. It was even doubtful if she would live long enough to be turned according to the vision Alice had recently had.'  A little too risky if you ask me!  Maybe there should be a Plan C?

Ah, finally she gets to enjoy this: ‘the closeness, the electricity, made her body hum immediately.'  This time, some real vampire sex!  And she lives to tell the tale.

‘"I bruise easily." She reminded him. Still, he lowered himself to each bruise in turn, and kissed it gently, apologising to each and every blemish.'  So much better than going all emo.

Progress:  ‘Never would she have imagined that she would be willing to sunbathe without clothes on...'

Aww, good for Gustavo:  ‘The terrified man before him had risked his displeasure to tell him that there was a tropical storm brewing off the coast...'

A good sign:  ‘Charlie looked slightly out of place as he stood with the rest, but the grin on his face as he saw her showed that he felt quite comfortable in their close company.'  And later ‘Bella was amazed that he had actually unhooked his boat from the back [of his truck] to come and pick her up.'

Hmm:  ‘Charlie looked well, better than he had ever looked, if she was honest.'  He probably hadn't ever been looked after as carefully as he was at the Cullen house.

My favorite part of the family greetings:  ‘Jasper put a hand on her shoulder and she felt warmth flood her, she met his eyes and tears filled hers as he transmitted how happy they all were to see her.'  This was fun too:  ‘Emmett wasn't exactly ignorable.'

Giggle:  ‘...Charlie set off first. It would probably be the first time in history that the Cullen family travelled any distance and kept to the speed limit.'

That's a good point that Bella could be taking a job away from someone who really needs it.

Aww, ‘She really would miss Charlie through her newborn phase. He was the first person who she had ever known for certain loved her.'

I totally agree with Bella's tantrum at Alice - it's hard to imagine how else she would ever get Alice's attention, to be taken seriously.  Nobody else even tries any more. I especially enjoyed her throwing the D&G jeans into the fire.  Hopefully Edward will listen to her enough to understand how she feels.

 

Reviewer: renee aubin Signed [Report This]
Date: 05 May 2014 4:09 AM Title: Chapter 38

You scared me!  Even early in this chapter I was wondering how he could be so relaxed when he had just bit her!  But then the feathers, and ...oh, I get it.  Sneaky author.

Fun:  ‘It was strange, he thought, he remembered that as they had started making love he had thought proper words for everything, but as the exercise continued the colloquialisms that were in use of late took over, the dry clinical names were just inadequate for how he felt.'

Your Bella is delightful: "Are you saying we are tame?" Sometimes I think she doesn't have a filter at all.

Thank you for being honest that for some of us, sex hurts in the beginning, and the lingering soreness can be significant.  Not that it isn't totally worth it!  This is true too:  ‘Not that she would not have welcomed the relief of him leaving her body...'  And she would surely have worried about whether he'd want to "do it" again soon.

At least she eventually lets herself relax and enjoy their closeness.  You gave us some lovely moments afterwards.

Nice:  ‘What was she doing to him? He had never in his entire existence lost focus the way he did around her.'

Snicker:  ‘...her hands trying to cover all the bits he most wished to see.'

Sweet:  ‘She put her head onto his chest, marvelling at the fact that there was no heartbeat but she knew he had one of the largest hearts of anyone she had ever met.'

Amusing that she can't stand that Gustavo and Kaure would know how B&E had wrecked the bedroom...

Funny:  ‘He rushed into the bathroom to help her, she growled at him and he raised his hands and retreated, leaving her to her privacy for the first time in days.'  Yes, she needs at least a little space!

A charming moment:  ‘She allowed the current to push her under and went to sit on the bottom with him, and for a minute or so they sat there, holding hands, the only noise the roar of the water...'

Just as in canon, he's totally unprepared and baffled that she's so hurt by his refusal to make love again.  But it's hard for your Bella, especially, she's only beginning to build any self-confidence.  Stupid vampire! 

At least she gets angry, not just weepy.  ‘Well two of them could be stubborn!'  Oh, definitely. 

OK, now Bella, plan B or not, don't make any threats you're not willing to carry out: "You won't touch me! ...So I'll go find someone who will."  As if!

 

 

Reviewer: Pammie94 Signed [Report This]
Date: 04 May 2014 2:48 PM Title: Chapter 41

Wow!  What a fabulous story you have written.  Thank you so much for posting it and sharing with us.  I have really enjoyed it!

 

Reviewer: k1942 Signed [Report This]
Date: 03 May 2014 12:23 AM Title: Chapter 41

Bless Esme for the loving mother that she is! Who else would have gone after those clothes for Bella? I'm a bit upset with Bella, thinking she should just leave and let the family and Charlie go on without her. First, I never thought she was a coward, to let herself be run off that way! What needs to happen is Bella going toe to toe with Alice and telling her in no uncertain terms to back off and leave her alone! If she won't stand up for herself, she deserves to be used as a doormat! I'm sure Edward would back her up and do whatever makes her happy.I'm thinking a family council is in order!

Reviewer: theladykt Signed [Report This]
Date: 02 May 2014 9:41 PM Title: Chapter 41

Bella really needs some self worth counselling.   Glad she got to talk to Jake for a bit though

Reviewer: sonogal Signed [Report This]
Date: 02 May 2014 7:47 PM Title: Chapter 41

Bella needs to remember that Edward loves her totally. She needs to love him the same way. She can't let Alice's actions effect their relationship. I am actually surprised that she can be that far from Edward to go to the reservation. It is more than 3 miles away.

Reviewer: csp4 Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: 30 Apr 2014 8:44 PM Title: Chapter 40

"....is it any wonder that she tried the method her mother used to such good effect for so many years and threw a tantrum?" The word 'tantrum' implies acting unreasonably/childish. I didn't see that when reading how Bella reacted. Esme is right about Alice & Edward. Personally, I want to bash in Edward's head. It's obviously he doesn't use it!
Interesting thoughts Edward & Esme had about Alice & her visions over the years. Pretty much the same as I was thinking from chapter 1:)

Reviewer: Camilla11 Signed [Report This]
Date: 30 Apr 2014 8:12 AM Title: Chapter 40

Thank God  for Esme

Reviewer: theladykt Signed [Report This]
Date: 30 Apr 2014 3:03 AM Title: Chapter 40

Glad Esme finally got E to understand.   Alice is def a bully.  Now you have me wondering if Alice left B with Renee on purpose too

Reviewer: goldseadragon Signed [Report This]
Date: 30 Apr 2014 12:41 AM Title: Chapter 40

Ignore me for a second while I vent. You are a fantastic writer, but this "you have to go to school until the second you turn 18" thing really sticks in my craw. It makes no sense and I can't get past how artificial it seems. People graduate early all the time, and there's no way this would ever hold up to even the slightest legal challenge. It's frustrating because it feels like a big wart on an otherwise amazing story.

Reviewer: romance4me2 Signed [Report This]
Date: 29 Apr 2014 11:08 PM Title: Chapter 40

Wow, has Alice really been that manipulative?

Reviewer: asam75 Signed [Report This]
Date: 29 Apr 2014 10:21 PM Title: Chapter 40

Good to see Edward wake up early to his control issues.  Also love the direction you have taken with Alice.  She is a bully. I have questioned her statement from the beginning that Bella was better left in Arizona with Renee.  Is a childhood of abuse worth any future gain?  I'm glad to see you exploring this issue.

Thank you.

Reviewer: k1942 Signed [Report This]
Date: 29 Apr 2014 10:10 PM Title: Chapter 40

Finally someone has voiced the question I had, of why Bella was left with that horrid woman for so many years? What an accusation, that Alice could have had ulterior motives  for insisting her visions required Bella to stay with Renee. I feel so sorry for Bella if it is so, and a bit sorry for Edward . He just didn't realize why she reacted the way she did. Guess he has some rethinking to do, to change his attitude. It will break Esme's heart for them to leave, but it might kill Bella for them to stay! Too bad Jasper doesn't spank his wife, now and then! She seems to deserve  some sort of wake up call!

Reviewer: csp4 Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: 29 Apr 2014 5:55 AM Title: Chapter 39

Ah, Bella's tantrum was an act!

"...so she wasn't expecting a hell of a lot of foreplay" lol lol she definitely didn't get any::))

While I agree with Alice that Bella's clothes weren't very nice, I'm with Bella. Alice needs a smack down.

Reviewer: renee aubin Signed [Report This]
Date: 29 Apr 2014 4:45 AM Title: Chapter 37

Well said:  ‘He knew this man... well not this exact man, but during the 1920's he had made it his mission in life to rid the world of men like this.'

‘The man crossed himself in a pious gesture that just infuriated Edward even more...'  Yes, it certainly would.  Oh my gosh and then the guy has the nerve to ‘turned to speak to Bella, sensing that his fate rested his her hands.‘

 

A good example of how less can be more:  ‘She kissed him. He exploded.'

 

A nice touch:  ‘Their hands became frantic as she pulled at his clothing, not even realising that he had already removed all of hers.'

 

Hmm, you've created such a distinct split between Edward and "the beast".  Interesting reasoning:  ‘But he also knew that if he allowed things to progress as he planned, Bella, his mate, may not survive. He looked at her, so delicate and fragile in her humanity. The choices were clear, stay as he was and risk hurting, or even killing her as her virgin blood spilt or allow the weak one to take over again, and preserve his mate...'

This was convincing:  ‘At first his wishes and the beasts had been so close that he had not even realised that he had lost control.'

 

I thought the sex scene was well done, very vampire. But I did NOT expect him to bite her!  So damn, they only get to have human/vampire sex once.  

 

Reviewer: twimam23 Signed [Report This]
Date: 28 Apr 2014 10:42 AM Title: Chapter 39

About time. A Bella that actually tells Alice off for shopping and throwing her stuff out!! 

Good chapter too btw. Lol!! Xxx

Reviewer: renee aubin Signed [Report This]
Date: 28 Apr 2014 4:50 AM Title: Chapter 36

What a shame that Bella had to put up with this:  ‘Often [Renee] would invite men back to the house that she had only met hours earlier. Bella had learnt to be out of sight before they arrived, if the man found out about her and left before Renée got what she wanted Bella's life wasn't worth living for days, or weeks.'

No wonder Bella's a little vague about how to tell when "it's time".

 

Fun:  ‘She unconsciously licked her lips as she stared at him, only realising what she had done as she tasted the salt that had dried there on their walk on the beach.'

 

I kind of liked the similarity to canon of Bella getting worn out by the day's activities, but not because Edward was withholding sex from her, but because she was still recovering and he wanted her to rest.

 

Excellent vampire moments:  ‘She practised snorkelling while Edward coolly walked along the sea bed below her...', and later Edward swimming to the mainland because it's quieter and no one will notice him.

 

I'm glad she finally got this:  ‘She didn't think she could ever be as happy again as she was on the island, no matter how long she may live.'

 

Nice use of "I'm not going to let you starve!"

 

Good for her:  ‘She had never been a good liar... But if it was to protect Edward she suddenly realised she could tell people the moon was made of green cheese and sound convincing.'

 

Clever variation on the Port Angeles story, although perhaps because it's a single assailant Bella does better at defending herself.  Just as creepy, though, that Edward knows what the man's intentions were.

 

Reviewer: rclaurel3 Signed [Report This]
Date: 28 Apr 2014 1:56 AM Title: Chapter 39

Wow Bella is alittle ungrateful, yes she likes her old clothes but she is married to Edward now and doesnt she want to dress like him..

Reviewer: Ashmerlin Signed starstarstarstarhalf-star [Report This]
Date: 27 Apr 2014 2:41 PM Title: Chapter 39

Loving it!

Reviewer: LilCullen454 Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: 27 Apr 2014 1:42 PM Title: Chapter 39

Alice when will you learn!?  Bella stop being so damn stubborn - her "it's my way or the highway" attitude sucks sometimes.

However, Alice had no damn business throwing her clothes away!  Buy her new clothes, fine but that doesn't give you the right to throw Bella's old clothes away!!!

Reviewer: 10of15 Signed [Report This]
Date: 27 Apr 2014 11:54 AM Title: Chapter 39

Aliced stepped over the line.  Perhaps she will learner her lesson?  thanks for the update

Reviewer: romance4me2 Signed [Report This]
Date: 27 Apr 2014 2:31 AM Title: Chapter 39

I am sorry that Alice got rid of the shirt Charlie gave her. Alice needs to respect that Bella had few things to call her own throughout her life and everything she has is precious. That being said, Bella needs to chill about Alice buying her things. Edward put the right twist on it to get her to turn down the job!

Reviewer: k1942 Signed [Report This]
Date: 27 Apr 2014 1:55 AM Title: Chapter 39

Bella acts like a child when she does things like this, no doubt about it. On the other hand, Alice makes me want to strangle her! The arrogance alone would justify such a thing! They better learn to compromise, and real soon! The future doesn't look too pleasant unless they do!

Reviewer: theladykt Signed [Report This]
Date: 27 Apr 2014 12:34 AM Title: Chapter 39

Sorry I think Bella has every right to go off on Alice, Edward too. Alice has gotten her  own way for too long.  How dare she throw her things awAy. Glad they had fun on the island though

Reviewer: leslieljs713 Signed [Report This]
Date: 26 Apr 2014 11:12 PM Title: Chapter 39

You'd think after Alice actually drove Edward away from his family with her know it all attitude she'd know better than to push Bell like that.  Especially since they've had this discussion before. I don't like this Alice very much. She doesn't listen. 

Reviewer: Ariah Signed [Report This]
Date: 26 Apr 2014 11:11 PM Title: Chapter 39

Uh oh Alice is being a bit overbearing isn't she!  Poor Bella 

Reviewer: renee aubin Signed [Report This]
Date: 21 Apr 2014 6:44 PM Title: Chapter 35

This made me smile, at Edward's early 20th century frame of reference:  ‘...did women get randy? Was there another term?'

Interesting:  ‘If things didn't progress soon he would have to resort to masturbation. It wasn't as if he thought it was evil or wrong...he had just never seen the need before.'  To me it seems pretty obvious that masturbation (we have to come up with less ugly / pejorative word)  would take some of the pressure off, since he IS determined to let her go at her own speed.  Kind of a no-brainer (although not to SM).

Sobering, although they are alone on this beautiful island, ‘it hadn't been that long since the accident. The skull fractures had only just started healing, really she should not be so far from a hospital...'

Snicker, ‘every dirty thought Emmett had ever had in his presence came to the fore.'  So not helping!

Intriguing:  ‘The electric tingle every time they touched should have been so common now that he was used to it, but it seemed the voltage was increasing.'

This situation is getting serious, maybe even risky:  ‘'Distract yourself! NOW!' [Alice] said, he realised that he was at the bedroom door. He had headed there without even thinking about it.'

Nice that he realizes this:  ‘Thank God for Alice. ... If it wasn't for her he would probably have killed Bella on their first meeting.'  True enough.

And yet it's still humorous that ‘She was definitely trying to kill him!' Of course knowing Bella, she didn't have that intention, though she did seem to be enjoying the effect she has on him.

Unexpectedly affecting, "Mrs. Esme" and "Mrs. Bella".  Makes their marriage very real.

Good one:  ‘Kaure mumbled under her breath a warning that Mrs. Bella had better be alive and undamaged when they returned or she would bring matches.'  Another good one:  ‘Gustavo, with the instincts of an animal in peril, seemed to sense that his wife was in danger and he hurried her out with hardly a goodbye.'

Fun idea, that Jasper carved all those chess sets.  But I'm with her on the ivory:  ‘the taint of decades dead elephants'.

A startling thought:  ‘When Carlisle was young, men could be tortured on the rack and burnt at the stake for nothing more than speaking out against the king!'

Hmm, so did he find a way to affect the dice so she won at backgammon?

I like this version of Bella choosing to shave "everything" better than the manic honeymoon night grooming from the book.  Your Bella seems to be enjoying herself, getting ready for her day in the sun with her husband.

 

Reviewer: LilCullen454 Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: 21 Apr 2014 2:58 PM Title: Chapter 38

Go Bella!!!

Reviewer: csp4 Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: 21 Apr 2014 7:07 AM Title: Chapter 38

Oh, he did bite but not her::))

"You won't touch me!"...."So I'll go find someone who will." Not sure how his inner vampire will handle that comment. Wonder why she's acting like a spoiled child? Hmm

Reviewer: csp4 Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: 21 Apr 2014 5:51 AM Title: Chapter 37

"...it was like a missile programmed to hit" lol lol lol great description::))

"..and he lowered his face into her neck, he bit." Hmm, the question floating in my head is this a bite that changes or a mating type bite that doesn't.

It's amazing how often Emmett imparts wisdom that ends up helping E & B:)

Very intense lemon. Hopefully I don't sound like an idiot by saying this (lol), it felt almost spiritual

Reviewer: theladykt Signed [Report This]
Date: 21 Apr 2014 1:28 AM Title: Chapter 38

oh E, you and your overprotectiveness.

Reviewer: k1942 Signed [Report This]
Date: 20 Apr 2014 7:19 PM Title: Chapter 38

That was kind of ornery of Alice to tell Bella to say that to Edward, even if she thought it was for a good cause! That's the troublr with Edward, he's so damn stubborn, it nearly takes dynamite to change his mind!We'll just have to wait and see if this convinces him!

Reviewer: rclaurel3 Signed [Report This]
Date: 20 Apr 2014 3:09 PM Title: Chapter 38

Wow is she a bit dramatic...

Reviewer: romance4me2 Signed [Report This]
Date: 20 Apr 2014 1:16 PM Title: Chapter 38

Sneaky little thing...he bit the pillow!  I enjoyed the chapter!

Reviewer: Camilla11 Signed [Report This]
Date: 20 Apr 2014 9:17 AM Title: Chapter 38

Frankly it is difficult to believe that she can be so stupid.

Reviewer: tlwatkins36 Signed [Report This]
Date: 20 Apr 2014 2:03 AM Title: Chapter 37

what???

Reviewer: theladykt Signed [Report This]
Date: 20 Apr 2014 1:15 AM Title: Chapter 37

ooooh  Dancing Lemon time.   But ACK for the bite

dl

Reviewer: Angelik Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: 19 Apr 2014 10:33 PM Title: Chapter 37

They finally signed his bond mate lol ....... 

He bit! And now?? Bella becomes a vampire now? 

Update shortly before my nails cease to exist for both myself biting lol.


Reviewer: k1942 Signed [Report This]
Date: 19 Apr 2014 10:31 PM Title: Chapter 37

Of course he bit, he's a vampire, not a human! Since sex is overwhelming, even for us, how much more so must it be for them? Now we wait to see if this is the changing bite, or something else! Hot love scene, by the way!

Reviewer: artri Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: 19 Apr 2014 7:40 PM Title: Chapter 37

OMG!!! that was the best scene I've read in a long time, going to have a cold shower now.

Reviewer: queencullen0527 Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: 19 Apr 2014 6:18 PM Title: Chapter 37

oh snap bite

Reviewer: romance4me2 Signed [Report This]
Date: 19 Apr 2014 1:09 PM Title: Chapter 37

Well, that was unexpected. The bite, I mean. I can't wait to see what that means in this story!

You must login (register a new account) to review.