Date: 23 Feb 2017 1:27 AM Title: Chapter 9 Edward
Glad Nessie has Jacob to talk to. How old is Nessie? I am a little surprised that they did not tell her before they went over there. Nessie reacted when she over heard Carlisle and Edward talking buy she did not have a reaction to Esme saying she was grandmother.
Date: 23 Feb 2017 12:44 AM Title: Chapter 8 Bella
I am so glad Alice and Bella are friends again. But again I'm confused if they were friends before Edward left why did Jasper Rose and Tanya not know about her. Oh my gosh I cannot believe that Edward was the person that Jasper beat up so bad. Does Bella know this?
Date: 15 Feb 2017 1:02 AM Title: Chapter 8 Bella
Please please please let everything come out in the next chapter. I want Rosalie, Jasper and Tanya's asses handed to them sooner rather than later.
It wasn't Edward "cheating" on her that drove Bella away it was her damned selflessness and not wanting to ruin Edward's chances at a career as a pianist. Personally I think Jasper should be sued for assault and loss of wages for what he did. Edward should have also pressed charges. I am really really not liking Bella's siblings.
Not yet. While Jasper, Rosalie, and Tanya had caused a lot of mayhem, things are still unfolding for Bella and Edward. Edward never cheated on Bella. If anything, it's his self-sacrificing nature that caused him to go away. Bella's siblings are not supposed to be likeable. Like a family, there are those unpleasant things you have to deal with even among its members. While Bella grew up in a close-knit family, it doesn't mean that her family is perfect.
Date: 14 Feb 2017 6:34 AM Title: Chapter 8 Bella
Omg! I can't believe jasper destroyed his career! I don't know how edward is ever going to forgive her family?
Because Edward loves Bella. When love was being forced apart, love actually grows. Think Romeo and Juliet.
Date: 10 Feb 2017 1:36 PM Title: Chapter 7 Bella
*shakes head* I knew something like this had to have happened. Jasper, Tanya and Rosalie didn't even bother finding out the truth and are trying to control Bella without her knowing. Well, you know what they say "Assuming makes and ass out of you and me." When Bella finds out what they did she is gonna be MAJORLY pissed and cut them out of her and her daughter's lives, at least I hope she would.
Yes, Bella's going to be extremely mad. What they did would eventually bite them in their behinds later.
Date: 07 Feb 2017 8:35 AM Title: Chapter 5 Tanya
She tried :) It is taking me some time to figure out who is the one talking I am a little slow sometimes lol
I'm still trying to figure things out on how to make the POV easier for transition. The title of the chapter indicates who is talking. I don't switch POV the entire chapter.
Date: 01 Feb 2017 2:49 AM Title: Chapter 6 Bella
I think that what your thinking and what you write are different.
I think that its a good story, but your leave out some details that are needed.
I think if your going to cuss, then cuss! Quit using the first letter and ***... spell the word, or find another to use instead.
Not trying to be a butthole, but I think this could be a great story if the whole story was included.
The reason why what I'm thinking and what I'm writing are different was because I have the story in my head but still lack the skills to execute.
What I need is more practice. If I become too critical of what I write, I'll suffer writer's block--the reason why I wasn't able to write for the past four years.
As for cussing, that's Jasper and him being in the military. I didn't like cussing at all but I know first hand that military men like to cuss. They try to clean up their language when they're with their family.
As for pointing out my flaws, that's fine. I know I have a lot of things I need to work on. I encourage you to try your hand on writing though. It's a good way to "fix" a story.
Date: 14 Jan 2017 4:29 PM Title: Chapter 4 Jasper
I like this, but it seems to jump around quite a bit... There isnt any interact between Edward and Bella enough to see if they want to reconnect. It is just Jasper, Tanya and Rose deciding that they are. Or so it seems to me.
You're right. That comes from my lack of practice when it comes to writing. I'll get better but it will take some time for me to hone my skills.
Date: 19 Dec 2016 12:37 PM Title: Chapter 3 Bella
So Bella never knew Edward cheated on her? She just thinks he disappeared?
Bella never knew about the incident. Her siblings went on as if nothing happened. Since Edward wasn't there, he couldn't give any explanation to defend himself. He just didn't show up one day.
Date: 18 Dec 2016 2:29 PM Title: Chapter 2 Rosalie
*groans* What do you bet that they don't know Alice was his cousin and that he WASN'T cheating on Bella..... Tanya, Rosalie and Jasper would have fucked up big time.
I'm not going to bet. I'm the author. ;-) Jasper, Rosalie, and Tanya love Bella so much that they would protect her from anyone who tries to hurt her.