I am a 29 year old mother of two. A wife of a united states solider. I work and go to school for my masters drgree. We move around all over the country because my husband is in the Army. I love the world of fanfiction and anything to do with vampires. I write Poetry and have even had some of it published.

Lame pick up lines from cheesy men and how to get away from them. 

Man: Where have you been all my life?

Woman: Hiding from you.

Man: Haven't I seen you someplace before?

Woman: Yes, that's why I don't go there anymore.

Man: Is this seat empty?

Woman: Yes, and this one will be if you sit down.

Man: Your place or mine?

Woman: Both. You go to yours, and I'll go to mine.

Man: So, what do you do for a living?

Woman: I'm a female impersonator.

Man: Hey baby, what's your sign?

Woman: Do not enter.

Man: How do you like your eggs in the morning?

Woman: Unfertilized.

Man: Your body is like a temple.

Woman: Sorry, there are no services today.

Man: I would go to the end of the world for you.

Woman: But would you stay there?

Man : If I could see you naked, I'd die happy.

Woman: If I saw you naked, I'd probably die laughing.

Man: Hey Baby Whats up?

Woman: You're time

Man: That dress would look great on my floor in the morning.

Woman: I didn't know you were a cross dresser...thanks for clearing that up.

Pick up lines from women 

Woman: My friends have a bet going and i wanted to see who was right...maybe you can help me? She says boxers. She says briefs, but i think you go comando!

Man: stunded in to silence because he has never had a woman use a good pick up line before so he shows that he is indeed not wearing anything and offers to buy her a drink.