Now you've made me cry... those assholes deserve the worst punishment ever...

I would like to think that Edward will be different when he comes into the story but I'm not holding my breath...

Freaking bunch of weirdos! I hate them all, poor Bella, she hasn't realized it yet, but part of her still remembers her real life and that her true identity is other than this "Elizabeth" persona those criminals created.  I fear for her, and I hope that Edward will eventually protect and respect the real Bella.

That creep Aro, wanting his "right as your Father to plant the first seed", every time that fact is mentioned I just want to castrate him.  Evil, evil man.

I'm very pleased to see that even though Edward was raised in that hell and has never known any different, he is still his own person even if it is a tiny bit of him that has the potential to question Aro's actions so I hope this will serve in the future to help Bella, protect her and one day set them free of that cult.

I'm wondering who Edward's former mate was and I'm thinking she didn't just leave, she was killed because she was resisting what she was supposed to do. Maybe you'll tell us in later on in the story.

Great chapter!

I think those bastards are starting her on some fertility drugs, so the head bastard can impregnate Bella when he rapes her (because that's what it'll be, it doesn't matter if she stays still trying to "make Father happy").

Esme and Carlisle seemed nice in this chapter... nice for kidnapping cult members.  I would like to think they stay in that Hell because they are forced to one for some reason, but that they are aware that what they are doing is wrong; but I'm not sure about that, so I won't be holding my breath for it.

I'm loving how accepting and warm are Renee and Charlie, they aren't usually portrayed like that and much less being married!  Bella is as sweet as always, and I feel bad for Edward, always expecting things to go bad again, which is understandable considering his background.

I hope we get to read more about Edward interacting with Renee and Charlie and getting more comfortable with them.  I like that they try to make Edward feel welcome and appreciated and do not push him too much.

Bella and Edward are going too fast and I'm interested to see what her parents will think about this development in their relationship.

I liked the way Jake acted with Bella, completely assertive and that way he got what he wanted... but I still think he's expecting something more from Bella and/or has a hidden agenda, let's see if I'm right.

I hate the way Charlie is treating Bella, because he really is treating her like a slut and not like a teenager that messed up and needs boundaries as well as supervision, but I think he's going way overboard.  I understand he's sad and angry ant the same time and he loves his daughter, but still...

That idiot chooses NOW to obey orders given by authority? NOW?  He started this story being so sure of himself and doing whatever he wanted and now he can't even phone Bella once (hell, even texting her would have been acceptable) to let her know that he's thinking of her.  What an idiot!  When he finally approaches Bella I hope she makes him work hard for her forgiveness.

The oddities in Bella's behavior are starting to show more and more, I'm wondering how long will it take for Charlie to realize how much abuse his daughter has endured.  Poor Bella, you describe her in such a way that I just want to hug her and try to make her feel better.

I understand where Emmett's demand to Rosalie came from, but I think he was too harsh.  Rose should have filtered her thoughts a lot, maybe even completely censored them, until she got a better knowledge of Bella's character, but hopefuly she will understand what she did wrong both times and change her way of talking to Bella a bit, at least until she makes Bella understand she is not attacking her, nor trying to belittle her.

I'm wondering if/when we will hear from Bella herself.  All this change must be very scary for her.

Great chapter!

We don't even know the exact extent of the abuse Bella endured with her mother and I'm already wanting to kill that witch of a mother she has!

Charlie's moment with Bella after her nightmare was very sweet and I hope it helped to reassure Bella a little bit more; I think they need to sit down and have a good, long talk between Bella, Emmett and Charlie because they need to clear a lot of things up with her.

Good chapter!

Oh, the men are all so sweet with Bella, I think the fact that they see her so vulnerable and timid awakes in all of them the desire to protect her and make her feel safe.

How much sweeter can you get that Edward, Charlie and Emmett getting together to give her a puppy? Awww, so sweet! lol

Right now I'm waiting for the crap to hit the fan, things have gone too smoothly, something has got to go out of balance.

Good chapter!

What's going on with Emmett? Did he and Rosalie had a fight? I don't think he would be drinking, leaving Bella and his friends if he wasn't upset about something.

Bella still needs a lot of help, she still feels she needs to earn her place among her family and friends, always thinking she has to do things to make them happy and to love and accept her; deep down she hasn't realized she IS worthy of their love just because she is herself and not for what she does for any of them.

Good chapter!

Yes! The witch is going away for ten years, that's great!  Alice's parting word to Renee were very appropriate, I hope she gets to live every day of those ten years what it is like to be at the mercy of others, when those others have no mercy to give. 

Now they have to focus on helping Bella, motivating and convincing her to go to therapy, or something to help her heal.

The way Edward and Jasper, with the help of Emmett, bargained for the right to date the ladies of their choice was very funny, Emmett was a great mediator.

I thought Bella's first session was promising, it will be difficult and painful, but the end result will be worth it, she will be finally able to step out from her mother's shadow and that's priceless.

Emmett's talk with Victoria was long overdue, they were both getting hurt by being in a relationship.  Victoria's reaction was not unexpected, she didn't want to let go of him and was hanging on to the illusion of a romantic relationship with him, but it was not real, hopefully when she has time to process it, she can be friends with Emmett or at least maintain her friendship with Bella.

It seems Bella is getting very interested in the whole polygamist marriage, but of course who wouldn't consider it if you have Edward as poster boy! LOL

Good chapter!

Phew! This was a very difficult chapter to read, poor Rosalie, she's very strong to have survived all that abuse.

I think that what she told Bella of how things where handled at her house growing up helps to see what Edward, Rosalie and Alice have like a healthy and very well defined relationship, that it actually works for them all and not just Edward.

Hope you're doing fine, and I'll see you soon!

Rosalie really needs to do some serious soul searching, I understand she has been severely traumatized, but she is too demanding and egotistic; she is unable right now to see beyond herself to the needs of others, even when she demands the spankings from Edward she doesn't acknowledge how difficult it really is for him, but he does it because he made the vow to look out for her and fulfill her needs; she also doesn't realize that Alice needs support at times, just like she does, and she doesn't consider that the blossoming bond between Edward and Bella might be every bit as important as her bond with him...  I hope she comes to see this things some day, she's not an evil witch, just human.

Good chapter!

P.S.  Happy Belated Birthday!

I think the office sex, apart from hot-hot-hot!, was believable; with him being in a polygamous marriage, every little free time must count for something, and it will be even more necessary when he deepens his relationship with Bella.  Also, this intimate moment served to reassure Rosalie that they are a couple with a strong bond that won't be damaged by adding Bella into the equation.

Good chapter!

P.S. It's good that doctors keep a change of clothes in the hospital, isn't it?  If not, what could Edward have done with his ripped scrubs?  lol

I loved this chapter.  Rosalie did seem different in this chapter, more balanced... freer somehow.  She might not be convinced that Bella would be a good addition to their family because of her lack of experience but not out of dislike for Bella nor because of jealousy.  She was willing to listen, and that's a first; she had been too centered on her feelings and her objectives that it made her act selfishly, but she's ready now to move forward with her life and her family, and I think she does see Bella with them, even if she hasn't acknowledged it consciously even to herself.

I'm worried about Rosalie's sisters, what if her father is up to no good, as usual?

I hope you're doing well, and see you soon!

Finally Edward is doing something right, he's going slow and steady with Bella, that way she can actually believe him when he comes clean about his feelings for her, and even then I'm betting she will doubt him and herself.

Good chapter!

I liked Emmett's personality in this story, he was much more subdued, very prim and proper, calling Rosalie "Miss Hale" all the time, no wonder she was going crazy!

The lemon was really hot and it let them show their passionate side, the one they hadn't really shown to one another before that.

Great one-shot!

Jacob was a complete ass, I would have loved to hear what Edward said to him, just for the fun of it. 

I'm glad Bella finally had that final push, when Ryanne asked her about being fat, that she desperately needed in order to beat her eating disorder.

And what can I tell you about Ryanne? She was a beautiful little character, very lovable and sweet, and Her interaction with both Edward and Bella was pure and so cute!

The 'final reveal' of all the couples was very funny, Alice and Jasper will probable be scarred for life after having caught Bella and Edward going at it.  Simply funny!

Great one-shot and excellent series!

I can't wait for the end of May so we can start reading "Whirlwind", good luck with the writing process and see you soon! 

Hmm... this story (or chapter, if you decide to continue it) was entertaining, I like Edward being submissive with Bella.  If I could "complain" about something is that it was too short, I would have loved for Bella to really, really get into a scene with him, because she barely tested his restraint in this part of the story.  Even so, it was pretty sexy, so I can't really complain about anything.   ^_^ 

I think what you wrote can be the beginning of a very interesting story, I would love to read more about this characters, their backgrounds, family/friends, their goals and why they want a dom/sub relationship; for example, it would be interesting to read Bella's impressions about Edward, and how long she has been a Domme; likewise, I would love to see the contrast about the 'everyday-working' Edward in opposition to submissive Edward, he mentioned having too much control in his life, so what exactly was he referring to?...  So many interesting possibilities in this story, that if you decide to continue it after you finish Shadow of the Day, I'm up for it!

Good one-shot/first chapter! (hopefully not the last)

Hi! I'm sorry that you lost your grandmother, my sincerest condolences to you and your family. 

I'm glad you are finishing this story, which I've enjoyed tremendously, I can't wait until it's finished so I can read it all in one go, lol. 

Thank you for the brief recap on chapter 22 because it did help a lot in order to get back into the flow of the story.  

I think Bella and Edward are dealing with that unjust ruling surprisingly well, although it's clear they are struggling with what's happening.  I'm really curious to read the next chapter, to see how Edward really is doing down in that cave.

Oh! And that Lauren has to be lying about the pregnancy, because that would be just too much for Angela and Ben to face.

Take care!

Dear, sweet Alice.  "What are basic necesities?" The girl really needs the reality check that's coming her way.  The saddest part is that there are really people out there spending enormous amounts of money on "stuff" (even if its 'designer' stuff). Edward is no saint and he also needs to straighten his priorities; I'm interested to see what's going to happen wo both of them when they start working for the first time in their lives.

Good chapter!

I'm loving this story, with it's strong references to Bones and Criminal Minds (I looove those shows too).  Jane's attitude really angered me due to her lack of professionalism and work ethics, and the fact that she also lacked moral structure and went after another woman's boyfriend under the friendship guise was just appalling.  Maybe you can get rid of her (painfully, if possible) when she has served her purpose in the story?  Please? lol

Bella being the team leader is wonderful, I love when she is strong and determined.

Good chapter and see you soon!  (hopefully) ^_^

Hi!  I just wanted to tell you that I enjoyed this story very much, and I can't wait to start the sequel!

Thank you for taking the time to write this and sharing it with us!

Poor Edward!

He really had it rough growing up; but I think the decisive aspect was his father and Emmetts attitude against him: their lack of acceptance and love towards him is what really left him with zero self-esteem...

I'm glad you gave him a good friend to help balance things a bit!